Dear Mom,

I am truly very sorry that your precious snowflake does not qualify to be reviewed for graduate school admission. You see, the minimum GPA is 3.0, while your precious snowflake is sporting a stout 2.50. (A rule that is set by the graduate school, by the way.) (Note: the average GPA for real applicants is easily > 3.3.) And while her combined GRE may be an impressive feat in your eyes, the other applicants are besting her combined score with their verbal alone.

So when I contacted your daughter to explain to her why we cannot consider her for acceptance (again) due to rules that are not of my doing, it would seem that you contacting me--again (last and this year)--may not be the most efficient path towards your daughters success. Leaving nasty voicemails and emails, citing that I'll "rue the day", unfortunately do not change the reality of the minimum standards set by the university that are outside of my control, relative to your precious snowflake's academic performance over a 4 year time-frame. Moreover, your invasive "black hawk (helicopter)" parental behavior quite assures the reality that she will not be considered regardless of magical changes her academic profile.

Thank you very much for your time, and all my best.